Wednesday, March 31, 2010

The Clever Woman versus the Clever Man

I was very unpleasantly surprised by the latest Daily Mail article about the University Challenge this year. This year's brainiac is Alexander Guttenplan, with his own Facebook fanpage, and descriptions from ardent female fans varying from "amazing bloke" to "Guys want to be him, girls want to be with him".

Contrast this against Gail Trimble, the much maligned and then humiliated last year's University Challenge pariah. She was definitely misunderstood, and very much vilified in blogs and media as "smug", "sneering", "snobbish".

Whether she is or not, or whether he is or not, one would never really know unless one knows them. I doubt that you can measure a person's quality through a TV screen, and I think the extreme double standards is very unfair. Trimble's own statement in 2009 that "...I very much think this would not be happening if I was a man" has been much proven today, judging from the sharp difference in public opinion towards Guttenplan today.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Avoid dating such Men

(Most updated: 31 May 2010)

We were bored one day, during the taxi ride from one of our offsite meetings. So my colleague and I leaned back and discussed what we found what breaks the camel's back for us when it comes to eligible bachelors.

1. Calculating/ Cheap/ Stingy Tight Pussies (i.e. "niao")
We detest men who break down the bill to the very last cent when it arrives at the table. There is no need to be so calculating. We all work, we all draw an income. Don't make it look like we are trying to suck you dry (unfortunately not the kind of sucking you want *haha*). The worst specimen would be the one who suavely cards it for the entire table, then starts calculating and haggling with every man or woman at the table for the portion they owe him. Immediately. As if he is afraid everyone will run off without paying. Cheap. If you can't afford it, stay single.

2. Petty and vindictive
Small minded, high strung men who are easily triggered by an innocent careless remark, are very scary. The worse kind are those who don't tell you why they are mad, and then blow up every and any chance they get and you don't know what happened at all. Almost womanlike, but more vicious in retaliation. My cousin once had a best friend whose ex boyfriend took revenge on her by spreading vile rumors about her to his female classmates and they turned the whole school against her. Overnight persona non grata.

3. The Anti-Family
This was something an older female colleague told me she was advised by more experienced colleagues (kind of like passing down the knowledge) before. Never be involved with a guy who does not have a close relationship with his family. First of all, you will feel the tension when you go to his place, and like all lovely collectivist families, they will unfairly blame you for causing or not bothering to help abate the unhappiness and tension, instead of acknowledging their own fault, even if you came into play much later in the game. Second of all, he will never be able to interact favourably with your own family as well, much less your future family together.

4. The Garden Path Pied Piper
He would be the reason why you are chanting "he loves me, he loves me not..." as you tear hapless flowers. He is nice to every girl (resulting in unhappy misunderstandings, pretends to be super caring and not want to hurt anyone's feelings but ends up prolonging their misery. He just keeps baiting you on and on until you're interested, and then he blindsides you with a crushing "I treat you like my sister/ we are friends". But don't worry, he gets his just deserts. Because the girl he is really interested in will either never realise that he is interested in her (he is usually very gutless and doesn't dare to declare his love) or become insecure and dump him (because he is nice to every girl).

5. Tactless shits
I find men who say something like this "I'd hate to say this..." (but they still say it anyway), or whet your appetite with some caustic remark then refusing to explain what they mean, or say really unnecessary and mean things then create a backdoor for themselves by saying "I was just kidding/saying" or "you know I didn't mean it". If you think it was an unnecessary remark, then don't say it. Don't cause a well of hurt then backtrack and say you didn't mean it. That's crap and really bitchy when you are supposed to be a dog.

6. Tiny Men with Giant Egos
This include men who cannot handle being the butt of a joke, or overcompensate for their tiny wee wee by buying huge fuel-guzzling cars (I especially detest MPV and SUV drivers). The worst of this specimen would be those who deliberately hurt others by mocking or teasing them and yet cannot get a handle on their anger when the tables are turned.

7. Impatient Men

There is a Chinese phrase people use especially when they almost get sideswiped by a speeding driver; "赶着去投胎" (direct translation: dashing to reincarnate) Men who cannot wait are the worst. I recently travelled with a bunch of too-long bachelors on a cycling trip. Their idea of waiting? They cycled way ahead to the three pit stops, where they refreshed themselves while I paddled far behind in the middle of nowhere with no streetlights. When I finally caught up, they deemed that I have not killed myself and they rushed off again, leaving me at the pit stop. No such thing as looking after you, wtf. I will be safer travelling with a pack of wolves than with them. At least the wolves will protect me.

The list will be continued...

Monday, March 29, 2010

Lazy Saturday Insta-Lunch

Unluckily blessed with a crippling headache over Friday night despite sleeping at 9.30pm, my pain the next afternoon was assuaged by one Panadol Extra, and Jajangmyuen from the instant packet. I took a quick snap cos it looked pretty cute, doesn't it?

Friday, March 26, 2010

Story of the Bored - Sudoku Puzzle Difficulty 3

Play here but please remember to clean up after you are finished. Answers will be out in a week!


Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Coropata for Dummies - Level 32 Solution

Combining my Two Great Loves - Bacon Beer

MF Grocery is my new hero. He has combined two of my great loves, eating bacon and drinking beer (I knew I always had an affinity with the German Language).

He has created Bacon Beer. Looks gross but I like the idea.


Sunday, March 21, 2010

Coropata for Dummies - Level 29 Solution

A Rare Instance of 天作美

Yup, it was a wet Saturday yesterday. I wasn't complaining, especially after the nasty heat rash I got from blazing February. I welcome the merciful 清明节 (it always rains during that period) weather season, even though this means that I switch from the delightful heat rash to wet shoes and clothes plastered to my skin.

I took this photo on my way towards the library, to borrow some refuge from the relentless raindrops.

I claimed my seats at least half an hour before the event started, and happily alternated between staring down at my latest book and through the different brolly shades at the SSO testing microphones and pitches.

However, by some strange act of Providence, the skies suddenly lightened up as we started closing our umbrellas in readiness for the performance. We were very fortunate to enjoy the blissful cool air, as we watched the performance.

It was a delightful performance. Chan Yoong Han played the Schindler's List Theme again (he did that song together with the other two themes from the movie at the SSO's previous Casual Concert). Very nice, though I felt the previous time was better? Perhaps the acoustics at the Esplanade, or could it be the unfriendly environmental sounds from the road in front of the library? One thing for sure, the little kids wandering around the stage was a distraction (I wanted to take a photo of a little boy standing at the bottom of the stage staring at the soloist), and also they couldn't hold their tiny bladders and you could see parents hurrying their children to the nearest washroom throughout the one hour long performance.

I filmed a bit from his performance (Esplanade's so unfriendly towards cameras and recording devices) until my memory card gave out less than two minutes later...

The SSO also performed Strauss Papa und Junior's two polkas and one march (with one encore piece). The concert master, always adorable, was especially cute when he lost the sheet through one of the polkas, and gave a cute little act trying to catch it back, only to have the uncooperative piece of music fly away again. It was very fun and perfectly fitting to the casual concert.

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Shine Supermarket - Korean Food mart

Before the concert this afternoon, B1 and I rushed over to Sim Lim to get some booty, me a new card reader (I don't seem to have much luck with them) and him a new graphics card. I decided to buy a pretty cute looking one by USBOnline. I hope it lasts longer under my destructive hands than the earlier ones (watch out for the trash talking update here if it fails).

I will pop over to Shine Supermarket at Burlington Square at least 90% of the times I visit Sim Lim Square. There I can get my favourite Korean Chili paste, miso paste and other stuff very important for cooking Korean food. Now and then it has special deals when the perishables are perishing fast, and yesterday was one of them. I happily bought up some snacks at 50 cents a piece, tomato instant noodles at S$1, and JaJangMyun (炸酱面) instant mee @ ~S$5. Yes, I can cook 炸酱面 cheaper, healthier and faster but I wanted to taste how the Korean version tasted, and I was betting with Vater that I could get a nicer one (the shop did have another JaJangMyun for S$8 something, but no way am I going to get that). Finally I bought some lovely Korean pancakes @S$3. Hopefully it was the delicious street food Hoddeok I fell in love with when I visited Seoul three years back, but this one seems to be filled with Honey, not cinnamon and dark sugar. Sigh. Will give it a try and see if it's nice!

The most lovely part of the shopping trip is that the uncle or the aunties will always give a lot of freebies (which are expiring quickly), tucking them quietly into your shopping bags. So sweet! I got some really lovely deepfried seaweed in grape oil the other time, but this time, they seemed to have wised up and split the freebies up, preferring to give a range of freebies instead of one particular type. This is how I ended up with some Vietnamese version of Kway chup (don't ask me why they have that in the first place), seaweed (always welcome, though I wished they gave me the whole pack, and skipped the rest of the freebies), and some dubious looking crackers.

Coropata for Dummies - Level 28 Solution

Friday, March 19, 2010

FX Harsono: Testimonies

So I missed Kam Ning's performance at Yong Siew Toh yesterday. I was mistaken by the newspaper which mentioned that it was free, but did not say that one must register for the tickets. I was predisposed to think that it would be first-come-first-served sitting, and it wasn't until I checked in at YST's event calendar that I realised that it was not.

I was quite pissed about that.

But moving on, I decided to go to the Art Museum to see the latest art installation. We had intended to go last month, just after they moved the "Thrice Upon a Time" series that I ogled twice (but had not uploaded the photos), but since we went on a Sunday, it was S$15.

Being a tight pussy, I refused to pay S$10 when I know that the Art Museum is free on Friday evenings. So we went today, and saw extremely emotional yet disturbing installations by FX Harsono, ala 胡丰文, capturing the upheavals and changes in Indonesian society, especially the violence towards the Chinese people.

Turning right upon entering the gallery, I was fascinated by the sight of delicate butterflies pinned to dinnerware at a table setting. The piece was entitled "Bon Apetit". Harsono likes to include butterflies in his art pieces as symbols of vulnerability and beauty, doomed to be attacked by violence. "Bon Apetit" hinted at unrest moving into a home setting.

Walking further into the gallery, I was quite freaked out by the other displays. The video where Harsono visited sites where Chinese Indonesians were murdered back in 1948-1949, and interviewed family members and relatives left bereft by their sudden loss and extreme fear, was especially scary. Suddenly I understood the pieces I encountered earlier, the one with the wedding couple and the skulls in the same picture with red words sewn across. Even the installation where Harsono writes his mandarin name with brush and pen lines them in a black room, as if he was silently protesting the loss of his Chinese heritage due to Suharto's New Order.

Seriously, if not for that video, I would not have realised the true poignancy and destruction wrought by Suharto's government towards the Chinese, which later influenced the pogroms against the Chinese in 1998 when his government fell. It was very disturbing and ugly.

Story of the Bored - Sudoku Puzzle Difficulty 2

Play here but please remember to clean up after you are finished. Answers will be out in a week!


Sunday, March 14, 2010

Sunday Munchies - Homecooked Dinner

I swear I sweat more when I am cooking for my family rather than my liberal experimental Saturday lunches. For one thing, both Vater and Mutter can cook and Vater especially is very critical.

Luckily today I passed.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

My two cents on the Jack Neo incident

I do not understand why Jack Neo must allow his wife to attend today's session and speak on his behalf. Yes, we all know Mdm Kng, you "forgive" him because circumstances and collectivist society forced you to. But there is no need for the wronged wife to attend the session. He said his wife said she did not know how to handle the media, as he said later during the really short media conference, which could indicate that she did not want to come in the first place. And yet Jack Neo dragged her along.

He can woo and fuck his mistresses on his own.

Then he can fight his battles on his own.

Since you intend to remain together, you must already fight the battle on the home front, but you do not have to fight his other battles for him. Let him be ostracized and criticized publicly. If he dared to do it, he should dare the face the consequences. Why must the person who is betrayed have to fight the media war herself? If he has the balls to seek others outside his marriage, he should have the balls to say "wife, you stay at home. It is my fault, let me give you an explanation and apology you deserve to everyone".

Not haul her along, looking so pale and miserable. What kind of worm does that? And on top of that, he had the gall to cry, after saying it's all his fault. Duh. Don't cry, you coward. No one will believe it is sincere, especially since you have been cheating for more than 20 years. (On top of that, we can attribute that to your fine acting skills as Lao PohPoh with her infamous "hoohoohoo", you just changed it to "boohoohoo" only. Too bad Academy Awards just ended.)

You cheated on your deceased ex-wife whom you later divorced while she lay dying of a terminal disease in the hospital, by telling others you were available. That alone shows what kind of disrespectful enemy of woman you are. You disgust me.

And all the women who have been touched physically or emotionally by him, you are bad judges of character. Or so damn superficial and/or nympho to be able to accept a old man bonking yourself...

Train the Husband like a Pooch (Now I have really read them all *haha)

Excerpt from What Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love And Marriage: Lessons For People From Animals And Their Trainers, by Amy Sutherland

Punishment tends to have nasty side-effects such as apathy, fear and aggression. None of these are conducive to learning. A scared or raging animal does not make a good student.


"...rather than punish or draw attention to behaviour you don't like, you should simply ignore it."

Just as ignoring your partner's irritating habits will help to wean him off them, rewarding the things he does right - just as an animal trainer would - will also reinforce good behavior.


"you need to break the task down into baby steps and focus on the most important part of it...Overcomplicated and confused messages about what's required will get you nowhere Raising the bar not only confuses men as to what you want from them, but it also demotivates."

"...Not taking your partner's actions personally is liberating, but no easy task. I realised that I, like many mates, took way too much personally - and often saw offence where none was intended."

"... (should) guard against their deep instinct to boss another (person) around, as it does not encourage a positive relationship with your (man).

Instead, you have a relationship built on fear and resentment rather than one centred around trust and love."

"People, like animals, aren't wired to learn or teach lessons when they're out of sorts. Instead, be sure to choose a time to 'train' your partner when you are both feeling calm and in a good mood."


[Source: Daily Mail]

Monday, March 8, 2010

Idyllic Sunday Farm Visit - Farmart

The place has become much more shabby from when I last visited. Looks more like a lazy shotengai. Fortunately there were still a small petting farm for children to visit.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Saturday Munchies 19 - 手工面

It's been a while since I cooked lunch on Saturdays. Rummaging through the fridge, I did not turn out any of my favourite veggies, so decided a vegetarian lunch was out. I usually eat a lot of unhealthy crap during and after work, so I try to cook something half way decent on Saturdays.

I decided to make Mee Hoon Kueh, a popular handmade noodles that you can find in hawker centres, boiled quickly in a ikan bilis soup with lots of tiny fatty bits of pork. I wasn't really sure what B1 would think, since the Saturday lunch of horrors where I attempted to make my own 老鼠粉. But he was oddly positive (it must really be a while since I last cooked).

As usual, some deviations from the standard recipe. I couldn't find caixin, so I used spinach and carrots. I hate shitake mushrooms, esp the dried ones, so I somehow coincidentally forgot to add them. I also dislike the taste of flour that you sometimes get when you order this at hawker centres, because the hawkers like to chuck the raw noodles in with the boiling soup without first cooking them halfway through separately.

I usually make my noodles by hand without finding the old noodle making machine Vater bought some years ago, which was a ease to use but a bitch to clean. Like my neighbour says, more texture and interesting shapes that way. All I needed to do was ensure that the noodles were around the same thickness, which was ok, since I liked my noodles really thin and fat (haha, wide, ok?), even thinner than what the machine would have churned out.

I chickened out halfway while cooking the meat-light dish. B1 doesn't like ikan bilis, I thought to myself as I stirred the stock thoughtfully while the dough rested on the tabletop. I went back to the fridge and dug out a chicken breast. Pulsing the meat with ginger and garlic, I decided to take some of the boiled carrots and chuck them in for color and moisture (breast can leave you high and dry when cooked). I decided to have some unhealthy fried wantons so I used half the mixture in wantons and the remainder in the soup.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Affairs do sell after all?

Today as I was happily reading fiction at breakfast, Mutter came and chucked today's 联合早报(the local Chinese newspaper) at me. Woo, yet another 老牛吃嫩草 affair sexposed *yawns*.

Note: For those whose Mandarin is as trashy as mine (I always score badly and I only read gossip rags in Mandarin *haha*), 老牛吃嫩草 literally means "old cow eats young grass", meaning an old man having a meaningful relationship with a young girl much younger than himself.)

Big deal.

This time it is that local comedian turned director, Jack Neo, who got caught with his pants down. Ha-di-ha-di-ha. This was the same guy who announced in his blog that he felt that foreign talent were much better than local talent. Leaning back on my chair and staring at the delicious words, I pondered if the 嫩草 he's been piaking is a foreigner (like his bestie who also some months ago, was sexposed for a老牛吃嫩草, though technically thanks to the massive influx of foreigners to Singapore, we already consider Malaysians as locals).

Personally I find this unsurprising. It's always those who behave holier-than-thou who fuck around. We were discussing this at lunch last Friday when my colleague opined that men who cheat are usually assholes. Nope, that is not true. Those who have not been sexposed are very holier-than-thou and act extremely loving to their spouses so that everyone around them are duped into thinking they are the perfect couple, even the wives. Even after they get found out, they usually act repentant and guilty because society (well, more like media) expects them to do so.

However their spouses' reaction will shape their future behaviour. If the wife remains supportive and/or indifferent, thus the "enabler", e.g. John Terry's really silly wife, the husband will recover quickly and continue cheating. A wiser and more secretive bastard. And you know what people will increasingly think of the wife? That she's stupid and spineless because she cannot live without the man. Probably set back feminism by a few more decades.

If the wife becomes cold and calculating, unfortunately the man still wins long term. The wife would have to rely on spousal and child support, if she is lucky, or work day and night, to raise the children on her own without guarantee that they will have the quality of life they previously had. The children will be damaged long-term without their fathers, and the men? Continue fucking anyway. Though now, they can do it even more, because they are single and "eligible". Sometimes I really hate the unfairness of life.

And you know the shit that marriage counsellors like to spin? The "it takes two hands to clap in a marriage when the men cheat"? To which I say, it would take a real spineless man to fuck his way out of the problem instead of taking steps to remedy the situation himself, e.g. highlighting to his wife that there is a problem and sitting down to see how to resolve it. If it is the man who works all day and becomes less involved in family life, then discovers that he is out of touch with the entire family, he should work on being included back, not lean back and get blown by his secretary. Doesn't help the situation. I believe that "the two hand clap" nonsense kicks into play, if the man has already hinted or told his wife blatantly and she did not bother to respond positively.

What I find most intriguing about this whole episode is that it is reported in the decent morning newspaper, i.e. mainstream media? Not only the indecent trashy rag 新明 that I love so much but forgot to buy last night... someone must hate him.

But I digress, you may say, what are the juicy details of this affair? Well, Jack Neo has been bonking this model/actress (I never dignify the mistress by stating her name, that is like validating her existence. Let's call her the hussy) for 2 years. The hussy has acted in the Money No Enough 2 and is also acting in the cheating bastard's most recent movie, 做人. She's not even pretty except that she is 22 and he is 50 and she is only 3 years older than his oldest daughter. Doesn't it feel like it's fucking his own daughter?

She went to his house the day before yesterday and sexposed him to his very stoic 46-year-old wife, who has been married to him for 27 years. The wife said she already knew because 1 year ago, a friend told her that her husband was fucking around on her. She was probably more mentally prepared than her suddenly witless husband, because considering the maid and four helpless children at home, she requested that the confrontation be taken elsewhere. She drove the cheating bastard and the hussy to the Crowne Plaza hotel at Changi Airport (if I am not mistaken), where they reached at 5pm. The cheating bastard called his fellow Christians, his pastor and his manager, the hussy, her father and older sister, for support at the 4-hr long "discussion".

The reporters surprisingly so on top of things, were there as well.

I am not going to bother to translate what the cheating bastard said. I am never interested in what they have to say. I am more intrigued by the two women. The wife said that she does not care who her husband is with, and that most importantly, she loves him so she forgives him. What a supportive enabler! I am sure her husband's other and future mistresses are very grateful for her understanding. She added that they have been married for 27 years and their household will not be affected by this incident, and she only worries that her husband is going to endure a lot of suffering in the future because he will face societal pressures(?).

It's very ironic that the young and nubile mistress is so insecure that Jack Neo was cheating on her, that she went to sexpose him to his wife. She admitted that she threatened to kill herself when Jack Neo tried to dump her but that she only did so half-heartedly. She said she has always been very understanding that Jack Neo has a family and that she often reminded him to return home early??? Hahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahaha.

The reason why she sexposed him was because... three days ago, when they met each other, he gazed into her eyes and said "I love you", but was uncontactable (the actual words she used were 没有接她的电话与报告踪, i.e. did not answer her calls or reported his whereabouts. Who is the wife here???) so under suspicion that he was fucking around on her, plus the feelings of being wronged and compromised festering for the past few months, she become so incensed that she ran off his house to make a hoohaa.

I do wonder now if she announced deliberately so that more people will watch the new movie and make herself more infamous. Bad publicity is still good publicity. But I think she forgets this is tiny Singapore... and the cheating bastard has a strong fan base and network. It's more likely she can kiss her B-grade acting career auf wiedersehen and welcome vilification instead. As for the wife? She lost something today for the sake of her children. I hope they remember and love their mother always for upholding the dignity of the family.

I am a Farmer - 1 Month on

As you can see, most of the seedlings did not survive my good-intentioned but unwise transplantation. When am I going to be able to harvest them stupid turnips. I'd be lucky if they at least turn up the size of marbles...

Paying $$ to punish my Fats

Tried this at East Coast Park. S$10 for one hour. Exhausting. Strangely I felt the burn in my arms rather than can visit the shop @

Friday, March 5, 2010

Hedwig's Theme Violin Score

You know the crazy twinkling shit from Harry Potter movies?


Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Free SSO concerts @ the Heartlands

The SSO together with conductor Darrell Ang will be playing at Republic Poly, and in front of Toa Payoh Library this month. Remember to support them!!! Undoubtedly this will be much different from the usual crowd at Botanical Gardens or Esplanade, but recently with the influx of heartland mohs to Toa Payoh, shouldn't be long before one sees mobile peddlers selling Champagne outside the library.

Friday March 19 6pm
The Republic Cultural Centre (Theatre), Republic Poly
Playing Bartok's Miraculous Mandarin, The Spring Festival Overture by Li Huan Zhi and John William's score for Schindler's List (Shit, I love the last one the most)

Saturday March 20 6pm
In front of Toa Payoh Library
Playing The Spring Festival Overture by Li Huan Zhi and John William's score for Schindler's List and songs for Sound of Music.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

O Sole Mio "My Sun" Violin Score 《我的太阳》小提琴乐谱


Decoding Love by Andrew Trees

Fun tips for women from Andrew Tree's Decoding Love:

1. Wear Lipstick.

2. Accompany eye contact with a smile to encourage his interest.

3. Tap on male friends for possible relationship. It seems that men are 2X more likely to be attracted to their female friends than the other way around. (I disagree)

4. Attract a man during ovulation, and going on the Pill decreases male attraction.

5. Do not interrupt a meal date with a phone call. (I too, hate this very much, even for girlfriends who do this to me. Appears disrespectful.)

6. Do not talk about your latest diet or fashion or your ex.

Read more at "Want to seduce a Man? Smile at him 35 times every hour: The bizarre but true secrets of attraction" (Daily Mail)

Monday, March 1, 2010

Congratulations Canada on Men's Ice Hockey Gold

Solid Game! Lots of sticks broken, rubbing, jamming and colliding. The kind of violent game I love. Ich liebe Ice Hockey!!!

[source: AFP]

Congrats to Ryan Miller (USA) as well for being a great goal tender. Too bad about not taking the gold home but still, great job! (There are a lot of Ryans in team America, nicht wahr? 6 of them)

It's been great watching the Winter Olympics. Esp since it's damn bloody hot here, sometimes running to an insane 35 degree Celsius in the afternoon.


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