The Reality of the Singaporean Utopia

林语堂先生原话：“世界大同的理想生活，就是住在英国的乡村，屋子里安装着美国的水电煤气等管子，有个中国厨子，娶个日本太太，再找个法国情人.”

(Translation:) The famous Chinese inventor and literary figure, Lim Yutang, once said "The universal utopia of life would be, to live in an English home furnished with American conveniences and gadgetry, a Chinese chef, while marrying a Japanese wife with a French mistress on the side.

The Singaporean man's reality?

Nibblezware states: "A Japanese apartment furnished with Korean conveniences and gadgetry, American fast food downstairs, a Vietnamese bride, with a Chinese mistress on the side."

I like being Questionable.

Click on this url if you dare, and tell me what you see =P

http://5z8.info/warez_w5y8_bomb-plans

You can thank shadyurl for this creative, yet vaguely ayashi link.

In Your Face, Google

The 山寨 strike again.

They miss Google so much, that in anticipation of Google pulling out of China (not even sure if that is even happening), they made Goojje. You know, 谷歌 （phonetically 哥, meaning brother） now 谷姐 (姐 meaning sister). In fact they made a really sardonic, somewhat lame and yet oddly amusing line about “哥的留下是为了姐，哥依然迷恋着姐”. Direct translation means Older Brother stayed behind because of Older Sister, because he remains captivated by her. Up to you to interpret who is Sister and who is Brother. haha.

I smell a lawsuit.

I went to test the search engine, thinking that it was reflecting search results from google. Oh yes, it is... not even Bing is that "in your face" to Google. This is going to be fun!!!

全世界都在笑中国傻

S.H.E's original song 《中国话》 has been manipulated and reworded into a derogatory song about China, titled 《全世界都在笑中国傻》. Not only has this controversy rocked the entire nation, it has even become a entry exam question for the prestigious Peking University. Applicants had to (if my trashy Mandarin is to be trusted) find the rhyme in the lyrics, and form a sentence with it. They were to also find two words with the least number of strokes from all the verbs available, and use them to form one of the university's propaganda slogans. ???

《中国话——全世界都笑中国傻》

伦敦玛莉莲推平了国企盖大厦
莫斯科的夫司基感谢改革私有化
各种颜色的皮肤各种颜色的头发
趁着改革春潮一个猛子往里扎
多少年我们国企苦苦积累被搞垮
这几年换他们机械电子和化工物流全称霸
欢迎外商来做客
好勤快的中国人好便宜的中国货

历史长河向前淌
岸上睡着一只羊
河里飘着一条狼
狼要拿羊当口粮
羊要认狼当爹娘
羊要救狼，狼要吃羊
不知是那羊救狼
还是狼吃羊

全世界都在笑中国傻
辛苦挣的钱他借给别人花
全世界都在笑中国傻
我们犯的傻让世界都夸真听话

纽约苏珊娜雇了胡士泰当手下
柏林来的沃夫冈天天给领导打电话
各种颜色的皮肤各种颜色的头发
跑来坑蒙拐骗损招一样都不拉
多少年我们生产皮鞋衬衫和裤衩
这几年换他们倾销调查加科技禁运来敲诈
建设和谐中美国
好慈善的中国人好便宜的中国货

初级阶段过不完
政策一百年不变
老百姓没有钱
国内商品卖不完
全出口换美元
美元价值使劲贬
买股票买债券
根本不能去兑现

钱爱权权爱钱
钱换权能通天
权换钱花不完
光掌权不赚钱
光赚钱不掌权
不如没有钱和权
到底是那钱管权还是权管钱


全世界都在笑中国傻
稀土卖洋人和萝卜一个价
全世界都在讲中国傻
我们送的货让世界都夸真听话
全世界都在笑中国傻
自己挣的钱却存在别人家
全世界都在讲中国傻
我们说的话让世界都夸真听话
——请问，你从哪个医院跑出来？
——噢，那儿

The reworded song lyrics largely contradicted Chinese Government's policies towards the United States, attacking its over-exploitation of its natural resources and peasants, environmental devastation, to obtain the devaluing USA dollar. For example, the lines “全世界都在笑中国傻，辛苦挣的钱他借给别人花”，"多少年我们生产皮鞋衬衫和裤衩这几年，换他们倾销调查加科技禁运来敲诈” which loosely translates to "lending its hard-earned money to other people to spend" and "our many years of producing shoes, t-shirts, and pants only earned their anti-dumping investigations and embargo on technology" respectively, reflected the culprit's frustration and unhappiness over China's buying of US bonds, going as far as to abuse her own people and resources to only receive retaliation and resentment from an ungrateful US.

I have no comments on the video, due its political sensitivity. But I do find the culprit very creative and eloquent, despite the blatant "LOOT"ing of an original music video.

TGIF Specials 13: Japanese 四十八手 Shijūhatte

[source:SankakuComplex]

Screw you guys! I'm going home

Those words often uttered by one infamous fat ass, Eric Cartman, probably ran through another one's mind as he reaches the safety of his homeland. Yes, we are talking about Dr Ionescu AGAIN since he is now basically .i.ing us now that he is back in Romania, where he has NOW been withdrawn by his government from his post in Singapore (i.e. he doesn't have to come back anymore).

Well, the Romanian Government's Foreign Ministry basically informed us that it is not within Singapore's jurisdiction as the "receiving state" to persecute its diplomatic agent, and that it will turn the case to its own Prosecutor's Office. Fantastic, does it mean that the Romanian people are going to pay for the witnesses' trips to Romania?

How come when I read "receiving state", this image from Joey Devilla's "How fanboys see Operating Systems" picture, which I posted earlier, leaps into my mind? With a little change...

So everyone in the world (especially Romania), when you see this guy driving on the road, please jump into the nearest ditch. You will be safer there, even during the monsoon season. The New Paper was very thoughtful to have published his photo, which confirmed his identity (pls see O in this photo).
[source:SICCI.com]

超级白 means extremely white *tries to nod convincingly*

This mind-numbing repetitive drivel has only one benefit, ironically it is that constantly repeated phrase "超级白", which means extremely white in Mandarin (and smelly v****a in Hokkien. Keke)

Goodbye Mininova (and SceneTorrents)

Starting from today, only approved publishers are allowed to upload files to Mininova. Thanks to a Dutch court ruling that Mininova has to remove all links to ahem torrents within 3 months and face the consequences.

I would like to offer my appreciation and thanks to the Mininova team for the excellent work they put in for the last five years (Thank you for doing so up until the very last day of the three month deadline). To the courts persecuting Mininova, Pirate Bay and the rest of the torrent sites,  I say... I love the challenge. I guess there is finally a advantage to being slightly multilingual.

The Latest Obama Girl

I deliberated for a while whether to spread this viral hit, especially since this latest Obama girl is so adamant on her blog that she doesn't want the attention that international media is given her. Btw she became well-known after she attended Obama's town hall session at Shanghai Science and Technology Museum.

Well in that case, she shouldn't have worn such a teasing red coat and sexy black number and sat in such a way that accentuated her curves. Methinks the lady doth protest too much.

The best part is when she said in her blog that " I never wanted to go into the entertainment circle, therefore I rejected many TV stations' offers and contracts."

Haha, of course not, she probably wants to venture out of China. Maybe nail a rich old media mogul and be settled for life. Check out chinahush (it has even more scintillating shots of her).

Updated!!!
Her name is Wang Zifei (click name to see blog url)