Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Sprechen Sie ganz gut Englisch?

This book makes fun of the well-meaning, unintentional yet still highly amusing murder of the English Language, and for once, it is ok to laugh. I should send this to 'you know who', who spends more time criticizing my *censored*'s English than getting the job done. Lovely lady, but has obviously misplaced priorities.

Some of the most priceless gems of hilarity are those related to sex (duh!!!), but it could be due to my potty mind. Read and enjoy:

Carol and Bob Lehman will be going to Zimbabwe to spread the good words of the Good Book. We congratulate Carol and Bob for assuming their missionary position. (It almost made me think that the Good Book the line was referring to was the Kama Sutra).

Ardiles strokes the ball like it's part of his own anatomy
- Jimmy Magee

When a boy reaches puberty, he says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous meets Wednesdays at 7:00 P.M. at St. John's Church. Use rear entrance.

A greeting card message in Japan:
For you, I always think of your thing

Then of course, there is this...

No one wants to say that the sky is falling, but in this instance I am afraid the emperor has no clothes. Despite Herculean efforts by the council and council staff, we are still only dealing with the tip of the iceberg.
- Charles Millard (for the win)

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